Mother’s Day Memories When Your Mom Is In Heaven
There are a few days each year that I absolutely dread. This year, I feel like I am being clobbered with a lot of emotional days simultaneously. Mother’s Day memories make this day one of the hardest days of the year for me. I know I am not alone in the sentiment, as there are so many others that struggle with the palpable grief of not having their mom with them. As everyone posts new photos of them with their mom, I am struck with the all too real fact that I will never have another photo with mine.
My youngest daughter, Hope is a senior in high school. Her senior prom is in a couple of weeks and even just shopping for a prom dress made me full of bittersweet feelings. I am proud and happy to share in and make those memories with my child, but there is a gaping hole for us both in not having her with us. Graduation Day is approaching very quickly. Her absence will be felt again, not only for Hope and myself but for my nephew and brother’s family as well, since he is graduating too. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that she is so proud of them both, but I do wish she was going to be there.
So many people have said that it will get easier. Others say to remember the good times. Trust me, I do remember the good times and I am incredibly thankful for them. But there are days that I just want to cry and miss my mama and mourn the days I don’t have with her. If you are missing your mama today, like me, don’t let anyone make you feel guilty or like you have to be happy all day. You don’t. Grieve, be sad; you are allowed. You can even be happy that you are a mom while being devastated that you are motherless at the same time.
I will always remember growing up in a house full of love. Now, we had fusses, but we also just talk loud and are opinionated. So, when others think we are fighting, we are just discussing. My mom would have so much to say about the state of things in this world. And I love that she taught all of her children to think and have our own minds.
Everyone knows that my mama loved two things especially-shopping and cooking. My sister and I share the love of cooking too. We tease each other and have a competition when we bake. But ultimately, we both learned how to bake and love creating in the kitchen from her. As for shopping, my sister would prefer to just have someone look for her, while I love to look for the perfect dress, shoe or accessory. Yesterday, I walked through, Belk’s, my mama’s favorite store. If you are in the south, you know! But I struggled to even get through it because it reminds me of her so much.
I tease people sometimes and say that I am vain. But I don’t actually view it as a negative quality. My sister and I are just like our Mama and she was just like her Mama. We all want to look put together. If we did not feel great or have on any makeup. mama would say, you look peeked, go put on some lipstick and you will feel better. Some people make think that is awful, but it works and it does help. It is why I dress up every day. You won’t find us on the people of Walmart! LOL!
Mama’s, You Deserve The Recognition
In close, I hope each and every Mama gets the recognition that they deserve today. Being a mother is the hardest job on the planet. The rewards are exceptional, but some days are difficult beyond belief. If you are in the changing diapers and losing sleep stage, keep doing a great job. Some of you may be struggling with toddler stages and having a three-nager; but cuddle them and love on them you are doing wonderful. If your child is in school and older, find the balance of letting them learn to be independent, but still relying on you too. And if your kids are basically grown, like mine, keep encouraging them to fly and spread their wings. I don’t care how old you are, you still need your Mama.
Do yourself a favor and watch the video below. It touched my heart. Happy Mother’s Day to every Mama. And especially to my sweet, wonderful, Mama, in heaven. I love you, thank you for teaching me how to be a mom. You were the BEST.